I'm feeling a bit over-sensitive this morning, didn't get enough sleep and Eric left town. My mood is not good. If you don't want to hear my complaints, stop reading now. If you can offer a laugh or word of encouragement, read on. :-)
All week, I had it in my head that Eric was flying out at noon today. So I had my "plan" for the morning in place. We were going to go for a run, he would help me get everyone ready for church, I would leave and he would still be home. Last night, around 9:30, he told me his flight was leaving at 9:30 this morning. The difference in time with him is 1-1/2 hours. That's all. But for some reason, it threw me. Completely threw me. I mean, I can handle 4 days of him being gone, getting ready for a trip without him here, but tell me he's leaving earlier than I anticipated and I was in tears. What is wrong with me??? Seriously? I still feel like crying over this - and he's not here!!! So get OVER it already. For some reason I can't this time.
Josiah woke up at 2:00 a.m. with a bad dream. Which means I was up for about an hour last night. Then our favorite neighbor (NOT) was yelling at someone at 5:30 this morning ... outside. Yep, outside. She has a habit of either fighting on her back deck or yelling out her window at all hours of the night. I'm not feeling very friendly to her right now. Add that to the fact that I just noticed (as I was putting my shirt on) that her boyfriend was outside my window with a child, actually in my yard. Nice. Thanks.
Rebekah looked at me a little bit ago and asked, "is that what you're wearing to church?" GRRR. Sigh. Yes, yes it is. She was hoping I would wear a skirt I had laid out. But it didn't fit. Which leads me to another complaint for this morning. NONE of my clothes seem to be fitting these days. I am heavier than ever. And I've been running regularly for the past 3 weeks, watching what I eat ... My sister tries to tell me it's muscle weight that I'm gaining, but I just can't buy it. And, NO, I'm not pregnant, nor am I pms'ing - despite what I sound like today!!!
One other thing. I have a friend who used to read this blog all the time. Now she doesn't at all, as far as I can tell. I sent her an e-mail a week ago, no reply. Is she mad at me? Just stinking busy? Pathetic that my relationships are completely over the computer these days, it seems. Granted, we don't live anywhere close to each other, but still. I was starting to wonder how you can fight with someone you never speak to, never see, and your entire relationship is over the computer. I know it's plausible, but still. And if we're fighting, would I know it? Or, is she just busy (I know she is crazy busy right now) and hasn't had time?
See, over sensitive. Grumpy. Grouchy. Whiny. Too many little nit-picky stupid things going on. OH, wait. One more. I decided to take a trip to Dallas to see my parents. It is truly the only place I can go and get any sort of a break from responsibility. My parents are amazingly helpful. Love my kids. Take care of us. But it's stinking hot there. I keep questioning my sanity on taking this trip. And Eric is going with us, but has to fly home to take a work trip. Which means I get to drive 14 hours with the kids and no other adults. I will stop half way for the night, but still...
All right. Time to head out for church. Hopefully I can spend the next couple hours getting my attitude fixed! :-)
Sunday, July 18, 2010
Monday, July 12, 2010
A Letter to My Brother
Dear C,
I have a confession to make to you. Lately, while watching Seth ride his bike, I catch myself cursing your name under my breath. Now, I am fully aware that you haven't taught him how to be just like you, he comes by it genetically, apparently. How else would he know to try and stand on his bike seat while riding down the road? Or ride with both hands in the air? Or try to pop wheelies? How else would he know that going over jumps is the coolest thing on earth?
So, while I do know you haven't taught him these things, somehow, when he does them and scares his momma, I curse your name. Sorry about that.
I was reading a book about Merlin the other day. In the book, Merlin's power was given to someone else and he lost all of his. I do hope you don't give your power to Seth, but just share it with him. But, I will tell you, every time he wrecks and if we ever end up in the emergency room over his likeness to you, I will be cursing your name.
Oh, and you might as well start looking for a tiny motorcycle that a 6 year old can ride. Because when we visit, he's going to want to ride one. Just like you.
Love,
Your adoring, yet irritated sister,
Tonya
I have a confession to make to you. Lately, while watching Seth ride his bike, I catch myself cursing your name under my breath. Now, I am fully aware that you haven't taught him how to be just like you, he comes by it genetically, apparently. How else would he know to try and stand on his bike seat while riding down the road? Or ride with both hands in the air? Or try to pop wheelies? How else would he know that going over jumps is the coolest thing on earth?
So, while I do know you haven't taught him these things, somehow, when he does them and scares his momma, I curse your name. Sorry about that.
I was reading a book about Merlin the other day. In the book, Merlin's power was given to someone else and he lost all of his. I do hope you don't give your power to Seth, but just share it with him. But, I will tell you, every time he wrecks and if we ever end up in the emergency room over his likeness to you, I will be cursing your name.
Oh, and you might as well start looking for a tiny motorcycle that a 6 year old can ride. Because when we visit, he's going to want to ride one. Just like you.
Love,
Your adoring, yet irritated sister,
Tonya
Thursday, July 1, 2010
Fat, Flabby and (almost) Forty
Sigh. BIG sigh. I really really cannot stand the whole aging process. I want to feel and look like I'm young again! Strong muscles, toned body, energy, health, vigor. Now I have flabby muscles, fat body, no energy, sickness and exhaustion. How in the world can you fix this problem??
In light of this problem, I'm hoping to get in shape. I've started running again. Which makes me very upset. I used to run all the time. Ran 5K's once a month. My fastest 5K was about 23-1/2 minutes. Not too shabby! Now I'd be happy to be able to RUN 2 miles and not have to stop and walk. Part of the problem is that we live at 7000 feet elevation. The whole time I'm trying to run I'm sucking wind. Sigh.
Anyone out there with some hope for me? Encouragement? I want to lose at least 10 pounds, 15 wouldn't be bad. I know I'll never look like I did at 16, but I would settle for having more energy, not getting sick so easily and not cringing when I see my belly flab. :-)
Sigh.
In light of this problem, I'm hoping to get in shape. I've started running again. Which makes me very upset. I used to run all the time. Ran 5K's once a month. My fastest 5K was about 23-1/2 minutes. Not too shabby! Now I'd be happy to be able to RUN 2 miles and not have to stop and walk. Part of the problem is that we live at 7000 feet elevation. The whole time I'm trying to run I'm sucking wind. Sigh.
Anyone out there with some hope for me? Encouragement? I want to lose at least 10 pounds, 15 wouldn't be bad. I know I'll never look like I did at 16, but I would settle for having more energy, not getting sick so easily and not cringing when I see my belly flab. :-)
Sigh.
Monday, June 28, 2010
Nothing
I just added a "followers" gadget on the side of my blog here. Why? I have no idea. I haven't been blogging lately, but feel like I'm neglecting my blog, so I just get on here and change things. There, I *did* something. :-)
I have no idea why I'm not blogging either. I guess I just don't feel inspired to write. Life is going along fairly normally. We finished school and are trying to relax this summer. Eric starts his new job July 1. The kids are being kids. Tons of fun, tons of work. :-) We've had lots of company. I'm trying to plan a trip this summer to go visit my family and friends in Dallas.
That actually brings me to a real thing to say! Why in the world would anyone, in their right mind, go to Dallas in the summer? Oh, maybe I'm not in my right mind... No, I am most of the time. So why? A few reasons, really. One reason is that I have two high school reunions I can attend this summer. I went to two different high schools (one private, one public). Their reunions are 3 weeks apart. So I really need to pick one to attend. Kind of hard to do that! Another reason is that my niece is planning on coming and living with us this fall, so I'm hoping she'll come back the same time I come back. Probably the most important reason is just to spend time with my parents. A good friend of mine recently had her mother die from cancer. My friend is my age, her mom is close to my mom's age. Life is short. We don't know when it will end. Since I CAN go to Dallas this summer and spend time, why not? I know, the heat. But there is air conditioning. :-) My friend has mentioned more than once that we need to spend time while we can. So that is the reason. Because I can go, I have time to go, and my family is precious to me.
All righty. Better run. Little Bit is waking up from a nap. She woke up at 5:30 this morning and wasn't very pleasant so I made her nap early. Not that she's sounding pleasant right now, but she is awake, so I should go check on her! :-)
Have a great day! Write me a note, tell me what you're up to.
I have no idea why I'm not blogging either. I guess I just don't feel inspired to write. Life is going along fairly normally. We finished school and are trying to relax this summer. Eric starts his new job July 1. The kids are being kids. Tons of fun, tons of work. :-) We've had lots of company. I'm trying to plan a trip this summer to go visit my family and friends in Dallas.
That actually brings me to a real thing to say! Why in the world would anyone, in their right mind, go to Dallas in the summer? Oh, maybe I'm not in my right mind... No, I am most of the time. So why? A few reasons, really. One reason is that I have two high school reunions I can attend this summer. I went to two different high schools (one private, one public). Their reunions are 3 weeks apart. So I really need to pick one to attend. Kind of hard to do that! Another reason is that my niece is planning on coming and living with us this fall, so I'm hoping she'll come back the same time I come back. Probably the most important reason is just to spend time with my parents. A good friend of mine recently had her mother die from cancer. My friend is my age, her mom is close to my mom's age. Life is short. We don't know when it will end. Since I CAN go to Dallas this summer and spend time, why not? I know, the heat. But there is air conditioning. :-) My friend has mentioned more than once that we need to spend time while we can. So that is the reason. Because I can go, I have time to go, and my family is precious to me.
All righty. Better run. Little Bit is waking up from a nap. She woke up at 5:30 this morning and wasn't very pleasant so I made her nap early. Not that she's sounding pleasant right now, but she is awake, so I should go check on her! :-)
Have a great day! Write me a note, tell me what you're up to.
Saturday, June 19, 2010
Blog Changes
Abigail wanted me to post pictures on the side of my blog, so I updated the blog a tiny bit. Not that I have any ideas of things to post right now. :-)
Wednesday, May 12, 2010
Texas and Colorado
When I was 13, my parents gave me devastating news: we were moving. Now, we were a military family, so this was nothing new. Dad had retired, gone to seminary and I new this would happen eventually. But, we were living in Colorado by this point. And I had decided I was going to be a permanent Coloradoan. I loved everything about Colorado, had made friends, was trying my hardest to become popular (great goal, right?) and had become quite the skier. If you grew up skiing in Colorado, you would know there is one thing ALL good skiers from Colorado hate. Texans. Can't stand them. I mean, seriously, they come up with all their oil money, their big hats and try to ski. They talk funny and take over the slopes. Nothing worse than a Texan. So when my parents told me we were moving I was very upset, but when I found out we were moving to Texas I was mortified. How could they do this to me? I could never tell all my friends I was moving to the most hated place in the world!
Sure enough, my freshman year of high school I found myself living in Texas. I spent way too much energy that year hating Texas. I wrote Texas Sucks S*** on all my notebooks. I had complete and total disdain for Texas and Texans. I couldn't wait for the day I could leave this most horrid of places and return to Colorado. Graduation from high school couldn't come soon enough! And I did just that. I graduated in May and by late August, I was living back in Colorado. Never mind that I was 17, couldn't afford out of state tuition, was making $400 a month and living in an apartment with 2 girls I had never met. I was BACK. Which only lasted 4 months, but that's another story. By the time I was 19 I did leave Texas, for good.
My memories of my time in Texas are pretty negative. Considering that it was high school and I was in the midst of rebelling heavily, not much positive DID happen! I've pretty much managed to deeply dislike Texas. The thought of the place makes me cringe. There aren't great people there, the weather is horrid ... Even though my parents have lived there most of the time since I left, and my brother has never left, I managed to avoid visiting for many years.
Enter Facebook. I reconnected with many old friends. People I figured forgot about me completely and figured good riddance. :-) I was pleasantly surprised, well, even amazed that some of my friends are actually Christians. What? Seriously? Shock. That people from Texas grow up too! (A tiny bit of arrogance and stupidity on my part, don't you think!) I've even visited Texas twice in the last year and a half and truly enjoyed reconnecting with friends from so long ago. And again, pleasantly surprised to find out we really like each other, have much in common and are friends now!
So, to all my Texan friends, please forgive me for hating Texas and Texans for so many years. Ya'll aren't so bad after all! (And, no, I never say "ya'll".) Oh, wait, that's "all ya'll ain't ...". :-) It's been very fun to see everyone all grown up! And even though I reside in Colorado yet again, I will not become a Texas hater.
Although I still don't think it's the *best* state ...
Sure enough, my freshman year of high school I found myself living in Texas. I spent way too much energy that year hating Texas. I wrote Texas Sucks S*** on all my notebooks. I had complete and total disdain for Texas and Texans. I couldn't wait for the day I could leave this most horrid of places and return to Colorado. Graduation from high school couldn't come soon enough! And I did just that. I graduated in May and by late August, I was living back in Colorado. Never mind that I was 17, couldn't afford out of state tuition, was making $400 a month and living in an apartment with 2 girls I had never met. I was BACK. Which only lasted 4 months, but that's another story. By the time I was 19 I did leave Texas, for good.
My memories of my time in Texas are pretty negative. Considering that it was high school and I was in the midst of rebelling heavily, not much positive DID happen! I've pretty much managed to deeply dislike Texas. The thought of the place makes me cringe. There aren't great people there, the weather is horrid ... Even though my parents have lived there most of the time since I left, and my brother has never left, I managed to avoid visiting for many years.
Enter Facebook. I reconnected with many old friends. People I figured forgot about me completely and figured good riddance. :-) I was pleasantly surprised, well, even amazed that some of my friends are actually Christians. What? Seriously? Shock. That people from Texas grow up too! (A tiny bit of arrogance and stupidity on my part, don't you think!) I've even visited Texas twice in the last year and a half and truly enjoyed reconnecting with friends from so long ago. And again, pleasantly surprised to find out we really like each other, have much in common and are friends now!
So, to all my Texan friends, please forgive me for hating Texas and Texans for so many years. Ya'll aren't so bad after all! (And, no, I never say "ya'll".) Oh, wait, that's "all ya'll ain't ...". :-) It's been very fun to see everyone all grown up! And even though I reside in Colorado yet again, I will not become a Texas hater.
Although I still don't think it's the *best* state ...
Wednesday, May 5, 2010
Dreams of Running
Recently, I've decided I need to start running again. I miss it so much. It's time for me to unwind, think and pray. I come back with an attitude adjustment and am usually much more at peace with life. But, I'm still sick, so I'm waiting to be able to start running again. A couple nights ago I had a dream that I think shows how I feel about being able to run.
I dreamed I was going to go running, but couldn't find my running clothes. After a while of searching, suddenly I was dressed, but couldn't find anything to do with my hair (which was crazy long). Finally my hair was ready, but I couldn't find my running shoes. I never did find my shoes - I woke up! :-)
I dreamed I was going to go running, but couldn't find my running clothes. After a while of searching, suddenly I was dressed, but couldn't find anything to do with my hair (which was crazy long). Finally my hair was ready, but I couldn't find my running shoes. I never did find my shoes - I woke up! :-)
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