I've been really patient with this whole not knowing thing. Serene, calm, not worried, patient. But right now, at this exact moment, I'm NOT. My living room is a shambles. We had it painted over the weekend and nothing is put back where it belongs. What to do? Do I put it all back the way it was, or pack up stuff in prep to sell? The lawn needs mowed - badly. But since we don't know if we're moving, Old Man is still putting in long hours at work and hasn't had time to mow. I would do it, am seriously contemplating mowing, but our lawn mower's self-propelled thingy is broken and the lawn mower might break me if I mow (which I am still thinking about doing). Hire someone else? Great thought, but so far I've been unable to come up with someone who can do it without hiring a service. Basically, I'm just tired of not being able to move forward. Do I pack up a bunch of stuff in prep for moving? Do I just try to reorganize and get rid of a few things in prep for baby #5 living in this house? Argh.
Ok, things could be worse, much worse. I keep telling myself this. Normally it works, but not at this moment. I will tell you about 3 people who are going through much worse things than I am right now. Maybe this will help fix my perspective.
Friend #1. They own a rental house. Went to check on it over the weekend. Largest amount of marijuana growing in a house EVER found in that county. Nice. They don't live in that town and are moving to England this summer. So in the next month they have to get the tenant officially evicted, clean up the house (which may require extensive renovations) and decide whether to attempt to sell or keep the house, all in addition to getting ready to move overseas!
Friend #2 (I don't actually know her, just know of her through another friend). They just moved to Hawaii. Expecting baby #7. Husband is on a ship and will be on it when baby is born. Living in a 1000 sq foot house - which has a termite problem. Household goods? Still on a boat somewhere. No maternity clothes, nothing. Oh, and she homeschools.
Friend #3. Her husband just died, at the age of 29, in a motorcycle accident last week. She is a widow, at 31 years of age with 3 children under 10 years of age.
Ok. So, see, my situation is NO BIG DEAL. No one is dead. My husband is in town (sort of - he works in another state, but he is home at nights!). If we don't get the waiver, no big deal, he will put in his retirement papers. Either way, this horrendous commute will end in the next 6 months. We can put the house on the market today, as it looks, and God is still in control of selling it. Bottom line. God is in control. He knows what is going on. He has a plan. Do I trust Him? Breathe, Tonya, breathe. Time to put on some uplifting music, pray for a while and get my mind back on track.
***Just in case you're wondering, we will not put the house up for rent. See Friend #1 above. :-)
4 comments:
Oh, I remember days like that!
What is it about having a new baby coming that makes you JUST WANT TO GET IT ALL ORGANIZED AND FIGURED OUT ALREADY!
Praying you hear soon!
Personally, I'd reorganize and even redecorate your living room just like you like it. Then you'll get your papers telling you you can move. :o)
Oh Tricia. Can I really blame this on pregnancy hormones? That is such a nice thought! :-)
(((Tonya))) I'm so sorry things still aren't more settled. No matter all the bad things happening to others, you are still in a very stressful situation, and uncertainty just really seems to bring out the worst in me, especially when I'm pregnant! We'll keep praying . . . hang in there.
I don't know about the hormones Tonya, maybe that and oh, 4 other kids! :o)
Even now (without the pregnancy hormones thankyouverymuch) I get panicky and grouchy when things are all out of order and chaotic.
Which, coincidentally seems to be all the time. Perhaps I'm just a panicky and grouchy person by nature. UGH, don't like that thought!
Glad to hear you got it signed! Did you redecorate your living room like I told you? :o)
Take a deep breath, you can do it! Keep an eye on the prize, living near your sister and a hubby who is not gone so much. Then start digging.
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